What's wrong with Tristan?
by xXgirlmusketeerXx
Summary: The knights find Tristan crying and injured after a battle. They become worried over his wellfare. Will they find out what's wrong with their scout?
1. Not really sure what to call it yet

**The knights find Tristan crying and injured after a battle and worry over his well being. But will they find out what is wrong with him?**

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><p><strong>Hello, people! I thought I would try a King Arthur fic since it holds half of my heart. My favourite characters are Dagonet, Tristan, and Lancelot. It's so typical that they all die! This is set a few years before the movie and is based on a dream I had after watching the film with my hyper sister and her friend.<strong>

**R&R, but no flames.**

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><p>Arthur cut down a woad and looked around the battle for the knight's. He spotted Dagonet not far away to his left, he was faced against four woads; he had resorted to unarmed combat after losing his weapons near the beginning of the battle but was not having to much trouble, as most of the woads seemed too scared of the giant to fight him.<p>

Gwaine and Galahad were sticking to each other's side behind him; killing any of the enemy that the other happened to miss. He smiled as Gawain leant across Galahad to lance the flighty woad about to crash in to him, when at the same moment Galahad leant over the top of Gawain and knocked a particularly tall woad out with the hilt of his sword.

Arthur turned as Bors' loud battle cry roared across the hill. His smile turned in to a smirk at the sight of the large knight scuttling around and killing with his fist-knives. He looked like he was having the time of his life!

Lancelot was sprinting around the battle cutting down god knows how many of the blue rebels. Being ambidextrous, Lancelot killed twice as many as the others, but somehow never managed to kill as many as their scout. He and the scout both had lean figures that allowed them to fight more gracefully than the others, causing Lancelot to find Tristan as the one person he could challenge to duels in practice.

'Watch your back, Arthur!'

Arthur spun around and stabbed at the particularly large woad that was looming up behind him. He nodded his thanks to Galahad, and scanned the battleground for Tristan.

His eyes found the scout fighting against a large rabble of woads. Arthur rolled his eyes. It was typical that their stoic scout managed to fight three times as many as him and finish barely out of breath. Tristan's eyes met his and the scout nodded at him in acknowledgement. He turned back to fighting and a moment later spun around and flicked a dagger in Arthur's direction. Arthur froze with wide eyes as the blade skimmed past his ear, a thud was heard and Arthur turned to find another woad sprawled on the ground with Tristan's dagger buried in the middle of his forehead.

Arthur shook himself and returned to the battle. It was ironic really; he was forever criticizing his comrades and here he was standing around letting them do all the dirty work.

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><p>Half an hour or so later the woads had retreated and most had been killed. The knight's gathered at the edge of the battlefield. Arthur was relieved to see that none were suffering serious injuries.<p>

'That was one hell of an attack.' Gawain frowned in worry.

Bors scoffed. 'You were the one who said that you were bored.'

'Well to be quite honest, I didn't really want to fight hundreds of woads today.'

'Just give thanks to God none of us were harmed.' Arthur interrupted to shut them up, but they simply rolled their eyes.

'Where's our scout got to?' Lancelot asked, glancing around.

'He'll be here somewhere.' Galahad shrugged in indifference.

Dagonet shook his head in worry. 'He would have joined us by now.'

'Split up and search for him.' Arthur ordered, though he knew he didn't need to ask.

The knights nodded and headed in different directions, calling Tristan's name as they went.

A few minutes later Lancelot' voice echoed across the ground. 'I've found him! Dagonet, come quickly!'

Everyone sprinted to Lancelot's side. He was knelt beside the form of Tristan. They were all frightened by what they saw.

Lying on his side was Tristan. His arms were wrapped around his stomach and he was shaking violently, tears were running down his face.

'It hurts.' He groaned in agony. 'Oh gods, it hurts.'

Dagonet knelt beside him and shook him gently. 'Tristan? What hurts? What happened?'

Tristan began to shake more, he was gasping for breath and mouthing the words; 'it really hurts. Oh gods, Dagonet, it hurts so much,' repeatedly under his breath.

'I'm getting him back to the wall.' Dagonet stated. 'I can't treat him here.'

'But we don't know what's wrong with him!' Gawain protested.

'There's no blood, so it can't be mortal. But whatever it is, he's reacting badly.' Dagonet replied firmly.

'I would suggest collecting his arrows, daggers and whatever else he has lost if you want to stay alive.' With that, he hoisted the injured man on to his horse, mounted behind him and galloped back to the wall.

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><p>An hour later, Dagonet was standing over Tristan's bed. He pried Tristan's arms from around his stomach and removed his<p>

Tunic. He frowned; he couldn't see anything wrong. There was no injury, bruising, blood, cuts. Nothing.

He glanced at Tristan. He was shaking slightly and the tears were continuing their journey down his cheeks.

'Tristan?' He asked hopefully. 'Tell me what happened.'

Tristan opened his mouth a few times, and his next words came out as a whisper.

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><p><strong>Thank you for reading, I will update soon. It does get funny, I promise! Just stay with me here! Sor<strong>**ry if the knights are too OC**

**In case you're wondering my computer hates using the term "woad" as a singular whatsizface, it prefers the plural of the *whatsizface*.**

***What are they called? Honestly!**


	2. I 'm not going to bother naming it yet

**Oneshot. The knights find Tristan crying and injured after a battle and worry over his well being. But will they find out what is wrong with him?**

**Okay, I know I said that this is a oneshot, but it kind of turned into a twoshot. I hope that this turns out as funny as I hoped, but I seriously doubt it. I am not good at humour.**

**R&R but no flames.**

**Disclaimer. I do not own King Arthur however much I want to.**

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><p>The knight's galloped through the gates and in to the stables. Arthur looked at the squire, Jols. 'What news of Tristan?' He asked, frowning as he dismounted.<p>

Jols shook his head grimly. 'Best that you see Dagonet about that.'

'So it's bad?' Galahad asked as he neared.

Jols just looked at him and sighed. 'Like I said, best see Dagonet about that.'

The knights quietly entered the scout's room. Dagonet was knelt beside Tristan's bed sobbing with his face buried in his arms. Tristan was still crying, though he had calmed down considerably.

'Is it bad, Dagonet?' Arthur asked calmly.

Dagonet calmed himself slightly and looked around the room. His eyes landed on Bors and he started sobbing again, but the knight's realised with a jolt that he was grinning.

'Dag? What's wrong with you, man?' He knelt down beside him. 'Why are the are you smiling if it's so bad that you're crying?'

The crying only increased from both Tristan and Dagonet. 'Tristan will have to tell you.' He managed to say.

Everyone looked at the scout. Who had been trying to calm himself down enough to prevent any further pain.

Eventually he started to speak. Between the gasps and wails he managed to say, 'In the- _gasp_-battle I_-gasp_-looked around to see if_-gasp-_everyone was alright and_-gasp-_Bors stopped and_-gasp-_yelled "rus" and it-_gasp-_ it very impressive because-_sob_-because the_-sob-_the woad who-_sob sob- _came up behind him-_sob-_passed out because Bors-_sob, sob, __wail-_because Bors-_wail-_FARTED!'

The knights and Jols and Vanora who had come up at some point all stood in stunned silence as the normally quiet knights clutched at their sides as they cried, rolling around on the bed and floor.

Gawain frowned. 'But Tristan's injury…'

'Was simply a sore side from laughing so much!' Dagonet gasped before he burst in to laughter again.

The onlookers all looked at the scout as he laughed. I t was the first time they had ever saw him without the mask on his face.

'Bors…'Arthur began, shaking his head.

'You are disgusting.' Gawain finished.

'And clueless.' Galahad added, grinning.

'You can cause a right stink.' Vanora pointed out.

'But you are a genius!' Lancelot grinned.

Bors looked at a loss for words. 'I'm going for a piss.' He said finally before walking out the room.

'Be careful not to knock anyone out from the smell, Bors!' Lancelot yelled after him.

Everyone spent the next few minutes in complete agony from laughing so much.

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><p><strong>Alright, I know it was short but you know…<strong>

**I will hopefully put up a short account of my dream in my profile and I hope you enjoyed the story!**


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